the President wants you to die

our President is going to use his first ever veto (he's only been in office 6 long, long years) on a bill that would have allowed embryos that were to be destroyed to instead help people live and walk. another master stroke from W.

even though 70% of the country approves of the bill and troglodytes such as Bill Frist, Orrin Hatch and Trent Lott support the bill (for the love of everything pure all the Senators from Mississippi and Utah, two states not exactly known for their well developed views on science - voted for the bill) W. is going to make sure that tons and tons of Americans have no hope at all and generally make life miserable for the entire nation - well at least he's an expert on foreign policy

and on it goes: dig the quote from white house eunuch (I mean press secretary)Tony Snow talking about W's view on the bill: "The simple answer is he thinks murder's wrong." Well I'm so glad the president is against the murder of something the size of this: "." But is perfectly content to allow many normal sized humans who don't live in petri-dishes in freezers to die painfully sad deaths.

now I'm going to go violently bash my head against a wall and thanks to the impending veto of this stem-cell bill there won't be any cure for that either

oh that's right I do love America

it's been hard for me to root for the United States lately - what with that little war in Iraq, and the fact that United States sports team seem to be completely unlikable. For instance U.S.A. basketball has for years represented everything aesthetically wrong with the game; and rooting for the States in soccer seems totally besides the point. Cheering for the U.S. in soccer is like rooting for El Loco to rock you harder than ZZ Top.
And if I had enough interest to care I'm sure I would have rooted against the U.S. in the world baseball classic but like 98% of the rest of the country I ranked the "classic" somewhere below a non-major golf tournament in sporting importance. That importance ranking would look something like this:

1. Buick Invitational Classic
2. Professional Bass Fishing
3. NCAA Women's softball
4. World Baseball Classic
5. Dungeons & Dragons

To be fair the above rankings are a lie. I would much rather watch NCAA softball than bass fishing.

Of course the main reason to hate team U.S.A. is because since 1980 at whatever sport you are watching you will hear the constant chant of "U.S.A., U.S.A., U.S.A.!!!" by fans of this country. No wonder the rest of the world thinks we're a little slow. If fans of Falkland Island sports - chanted "F.A.I., F.A.I., F.A.I." at every event they went to over the last 26 years wouldn't we have somewhat of a lower opinion of them?

Anyways what I'm trying to say is I'm actually excited and rooting for this new edition of team U.S.A. basketball. . .and nothing is going to stop me now. Expect a player-by-player preview over the next 15-29 months!!

a tribute to arcade games of the 1990's Part IFXIIJ#

before the Republican led congress of 1994 demanded their removal from the American landscape, this land of ours was home to vast houses of wonderment called "arcades". Their Gingrich led destruction is sad because truly there is no better video game experience than running to the change machine to get five dollars (that's right five dollars that how I rolled in 1990) in change before the continue game clock counts all the way down on your machine. Plus you could meet people, the guys who hung out in arcades were also pretty good in shop class they carried themselves with that cool confidence so devoid in algebra

a great arcade game from the era: Final Fight. Which I guess was just a double dragon rip-off - but one taken to the next level that allowed you to play as a giant guy who could bash crap - and jump kick

Episode VII

Dateline : America 1992

Bill Clinton is about to prove that moderate sensible democratic governance is perhaps, just perhaps better than draconian brutal unyielding conservative governance

the youth of the world are saying: "Hey the Beatles - you fucking suck. Long live the Spin Doctors."

Kurt Loder and Tabitha Soren make sensible unyielding brutal love after a MTV News segment on the upcoming Cd-Rom revolution

and most importantly the American people are swept up in an urgent debate that to this day has no answer: who should have made the 1992 American League All-Star team Cecil Fielder or Carlos Baerga; oh yes Peter Gammons had his opinions (Fielder)but the fact that America could never come to an agreement foretold the 13 years that were to come from the destructive policies of George W. Bush to the horrific Mussolini-esque rise of Zack and Cody to the sad steady decline in health of King Hippo

Carlos and Cecil a nation cries for you!!

a story to be told

speaking of grappling hooks does anybody dream about the NES game "Bionic Commando" in which you play as a guy who has a grappling hook? This game was way to difficult for me but my friend Dan was pretty good at it; this I what I suggest you do in your lesiure time:

1.) play "Bionic Commando" with Dan in 1989
2.) wait 4 years
3.) play "Super Star Wars" with Dan on the Super NES
4.) wait until Dan is playing and as Luke he misses a jump and starts falling to his death
5.) yell "use the grappling hook"
6.) watch as Dan desperately hits all the buttons on the controller
7.) laugh to yourself as you realize that the only game to feature a grappling hook was 1989's "Bionic Commando"
8.) listen to the Gin Blossoms

if only they made wacky youtubes about company towns

I'm obsessed with the town of Scotia, California. It is one of the last company towns in America. The entire place is owned by the Pacific Lumber Company and you can only live there if you work for said company and better yet they have a baseball field. In fact the entire place sounds so pure it makes me want to slit the throats of the impure who would dare to trod upon its virgin grounds. I wish I could stand sentinel over the entire city and use a grappling hook to swing down and slit some throats when I deemed it necessary. Scotia a beautiful place.

Larry King Style

I always forget that "Deadwood" is the best show on television and then every week I am reminded anew. Good thing it got canceled. (This was the first ever blog entry that I have composed that did not contain a spelling error.)